When You're Waiting for Them to Discover You Shouldn't be Here

Have you ever sat in one of those important meetings (with board or a major funder) and suddenly felt a wave of doubt wash over you? That moment when a little voice whispers, "I shouldn't really be here. It's only a matter of time before they realise it." 

This feeling, often called imposter syndrome, is incredibly common in charity leadership. Despite external evidence of competence (successful funding bids, positive staff surveys, improved outcomes for beneficiaries) many leaders carry a secret worry that they're just not good enough, qualified enough, experienced enough for their role, or the one they want. 

What's fascinating is that this experience tends to affect even the most accomplished leaders. In fact, it's often the most capable people who struggle with it most intensely. 

During my two decades in the charity sector, I witnessed this repeatedly in all levels of leadership; people with impressive track records would experience the doubt that they just couldn't do it, and that someone would realise they'd made a terrible mistake. 

This doesn't just matter because it's an uncomfortable experience; it directly impacts your effectiveness as a leader, as well as your wellbeing, and also your charity's outcomes. 

Why Charity Leadership is a Perfect Storm for Imposter Feelings 

There's something about leading in the charity sector that can make these feelings particularly intense. Just when you've got to grips with one challenge, something entirely new lands on your desk. You're constantly having to adapt, which means you often feel like you’re in beginner mode, even years into your role. 

Then there's the extraordinary breadth of what you're expected to understand. In what other sector would one person need to be simultaneously across service delivery, financial management, governance, HR, fundraising, and external relations? Even with all leadership training under your belt, the charity sector creates unique challenges nothing quite prepares you for. 

And let's not forget what's at stake. Your decisions aren't just affecting the budget; they directly impact vulnerable people and communities. That responsibility sits heavily, especially when resources are tight and you're constantly faced with impossible choices. 

How These Doubts Show Up in Your Leadership 

These doubts don't just stay quietly in your head; they can impact on how you lead in significant ways. 

You might find yourself spending hours preparing for meetings that should only take minutes, triple-checking documents, or staying late to make sure everything is perfect; all to ensure no one spots a weakness.  

This is turn can mean you’re making yourself constantly making yourself available to deal with every problem, checking your emails late into the evening and working through the weekend. All of which means you’re not getting the rest (and space away from work) that you need, making you less effective when you’re there. 

Maybe you've noticed yourself becoming more cautious, sticking with safe options rather than taking the smart your charity needs. That innovative funding approach? The partnership that would take you into uncharted territory? They start to feel too exposing, and so you stick with how things have always been done.  

Then there's the exhausting inner critic that follows you around. The voice that picks apart every decision, every meeting, every conversation; always focused on what could have been better rather than what went well. This constant self-evaluation drains the energy you need for actual leadership. 

The Real Cost to Your Charity 

When these patterns take hold, your charity starts paying a real price. 

Decision-making can become more difficult. Either you're asking everyone's’ opinion before making any move (because you don't trust your judgment), or you're avoiding decisions altogether, leaving important matters in limbo. 

Innovation suffers too. The creative, slightly risky approaches that might unlock new possibilities for your charity feel too exposing when you're already feeling vulnerable. 

Perhaps most insidious is what happens to your development as a leader. Feedback becomes something to fear rather than embrace. Every suggestion for improvement feels like confirmation of your inadequacy rather than an opportunity to grow. 

What Effective Charity Leadership Really Looks Like 

Overcoming those feelings of self-doubt doesn't mean becoming overconfident or eliminating all doubt. Instead, it's about developing a more balanced relationship with uncertainty, and trusting in your own expertise (remember there is a reason they gave you the job). 

Effective charity leaders build their confidence on their values, their experience & expertise and their strengths rather than the pressure to be an expert in everything.  

They understand the difference between honest openness and undermining their position. Sharing "I'm thinking through this complex issue and would value your perspective" builds trust. Announcing "I have no idea what I'm doing" creates unnecessary anxiety. 

Good leaders also get clear about their genuine strengths, rather than trying to excel equally across all domains. They focus their energy on these areas while building teams that complement their skills. 

In my own journey, I found freedom when I stopped trying to be the expert on everything. I discovered confidence in my ability to ask good questions and create the conditions for others to contribute their expertise. 

And finally, they know that confidence comes from doing.  

Practical Steps Forward 

If you recognize these imposter feelings, try: 

• Mapping your skills & strengths inside and outside of work, so you can see the breadth 

• Collecting evidence of your competence – feedback, achievements, positive outcomes. Keep them somewhere you can revisit when doubt creeps in. 

• Distinguishing between specific development areas (which every leader has) and the global feeling that you're unsuitable for leadership. 

•  Finding safe spaces to discuss your doubts with trusted others who can provide realistic perspective. 

The journey from imposter feelings to confident leadership isn't about eliminating doubt – it's about preventing doubt from driving your decisions and who you are as a leader. 

Constantly questioning whether you really have what it takes to lead your charity? Let's talk about building genuine confidence that doesn't depend on being perfect. Book a free 30-minute call.